What my daughter has taught me

Hi all. Today's post is a little different from my others.  It's a personal one about my family.  It's about reflecting on the learning inspired by my youngest daughter.  I have never blogged about my children before, and to be honest, I am a little nervous about it.  It is out of my comfort zone.  For as bubbly and chatty as I am, I really am a quiet and private person.  BUT...my daughter has impacted me so greatly, I wanted to share my learning with you.

A little background:  My youngest daughter needed to have both her legs casted for 2 months last winter.  We had expected it to be tough.  We thought she was going to be in a wheelchair for 2 months, and had even contacted the school to make arrangements for recesses, bathroom breaks, gym classes, etc. My husband and I sat and made lists of all the fun stuff we could do with her inside (while her friends and siblings still got to enjoy the winter wonderland outside).  You get the picture.  We were trying to keep her upbeat and positive and fill her days with fun so that she didn't feel like she was missing out.  Those 2 months passed relatively quickly.  Her outlook and attitude was always so positive.  Sure, she got frustrated at times (heck, we all did).  As it turned out she didn't need a wheelchair.  She could walk, play...even dance!  This was a major win.  She is competitive dancer and we had agreed to take her to every practice so that she could still watch and learn the routines, but her heart soared when she realized she could actually participate!  I wish I could share the videos of her dancing with these 2 clunky casts on.  It was part hilarious, and part totally inspiring.  She didn't let it slow her down.  She couldn't do the leaps or spins and sometimes she would feel clumsy, but she was just thankful to be there (and we were thankful for her amazing dance teachers that supported and encouraged her.  They always included her and made all the difference for her during this time.  Erin, Christine and Dana - my heart is forever grateful for the way you love on our girls).

Earlier this fall we went in for a check up, and they decided to cast her legs again!  So, here we are in the beginning of round 2.  Casts on both legs for 2.5 months.  This time though, my heart broke for my little girl.  We knew that the issue had returned, and in our hearts we thought the doctors might want to cast again.  We told her our thoughts before the appointment, just to prepare her.  In the end, we were right.  As the Doctor said that he would cast again for 2.5 months I looked over at my little girl and saw her head drop down, and the air leave her lungs.  She slumped slightly forward, and let that feeling of defeat settle in.  Have you ever been there?  Have you stared a moment right in the face and felt like it was too much?  My heart broke in that moment.  And then an amazing thing happened...

I watched my little girl take a deep breath, lift her head up and say "It's okay.  It'll be fine".  She looked over at me and I knew in that moment that she was choosing it.  She wasn't happy about it, she didn't want this, she was choosing to make it okay.  Choosing to make it fine.  I know she doesn't want to be in these casts.  They are heavy, they smell and they stop her from doing so many things that she loves.  But everyday she teaches us to choose that it will be okay, and go out and make it so.  She accepts the bad, and celebrates the good.

Such a powerful lesson from such a little girl.  She is our future.  Our students are our future.  Let's create in them a drive and a passion to "make it okay" when things kinda suck.  Let's empower them and give them the internal dialogue that would have them say "I can handle this.  It will be okay.  I will make it okay."  And then let's teach them how to take action.

I will leave you with this picture of my sweet girl.  It was taken at a recent dance workshop where she danced for 4 hours straight (for 2 days in a row!).  There was a lot of buzz around her as she high kicked and got her groove on despite both legs in casts :)  This is the face a little girl who is going to change the world.  She may not lead a country, she may not run a million dollar company...or maybe she will.  But one thing is for sure - whatever she does, she will face it head on and will always choose for it to be okay.

Talk again soon,
Carly

Returning to what feels right

Hi everyone!  Happy August :)

I know that it is still summer vacation (for us in Ontario anyway), but my mind is beginning to race.  Does anyone else stop sleeping around the middle of August?  I get to about 3 weeks left in the summer before my to-do list, and creative juices get going.  My excitement builds towards the next school year that is fast approaching, and I just can't turn it off (well, at least not for very long).  We can't get into our schools until the week before classes start...which is torture for me!  If I could just get in there now, do my stuff, then I could relax and enjoy the little bit of vacation left- but nope...here I sit all fired up and full of caffeine lol.

I have a little bit of news...

I will be returning to the classroom this year!  I was originally scheduled to be out for one more year in my consulting role, but I had to make the right choice for my family, and so I decided to return to the classroom.  I gotta tell ya...I am SO HAPPY!!!  I didn't realize how happy that decision made me until the morning after I had put in my official changes with the board.  I was sitting down and automatically just started thinking baout my classroom for next year.  Next thing I knew, I was scouring the internet, scrolling through Pinterest, digging out some books from basement...and it dawned on me.  I was happy!  I was "in my element".  I was feeling good.  

Don't get me wrong, I loved my time as a Student Success Teacher.  I cannot even put into words how much I learned.  Seriously.  And not just about the curriculum and general leadership stuff.  I have learned so much about myself.  I have learned so much about what type of leader I want to be, and what type of leaders I want to surround myself with.  It is so true that "leadership reflects attitude" (that is a quote from Remember The Titans by the way.  Denzel Washington.  Legendary film for me).  I feel like I need to sit down and journal it all out in my mind.  Actually, one of my take aways from the last 2 years is that I would have liked to keep a daily reflective journal.  Ahhh...next time :)

Do you see what I mean about sitting here all fired up and full of caffeine???  If you are still reading this...God Bless Ya lol.  I am just so ready to get into my classroom and get going!

So currently I am slated to teach a JK/SK this fall.  I am not returning to my original classroom...which means I will have a lot work ahead of me.  I have to unpack my classroom from my sister's basement (Shout out to the big sis who let me store my ENTIRE classroom in her basement for the last 2 years!  #Bigsistersrock   #mysisterwinsthegold).  I am partnering with a new DECE (not new to the job, but a new parter for me).  She is awesome!  I am happy to be working with her.  Let's all pray that she embraces my quirks, my ramblings and my high energy, wild dreaming.

Anywhoo...just wanted to pop in with an update.  I feel like we're friends...and friends keep you posted on the big stuff :)

Talk soon,

Carly

Using Google Forms for Documentation

Hi Everyone!  About a month ago I replied to a post on Facebook about using Google forms for documentation.  I offered to share the one that I had created for the new Self-Regulation and Well Being frame.  Sooooo many people were sending me their email address!!  I was able to keep up for the first week or so, but after that...I was lost lol.  I am still super happy to share, but needed to add it to my blog so that people could get it here.  I felt so bad that people were asking me for it and I was slow getting back to them.  I apologize for that.  June...craziest month EVER!!!

On to Google Forms...truly one of the hidden gems of Google Apps I think :)  There is so much that we can do in Forms!  I know that I have only scratched the surface.  I would love to hear how you are using forms if you have any ideas!

The key to sharing this though is that everyone HAS TO make a copy of it once they download.  If you do not make a copy, then any changes you make (adding educator names, students names, etc.) will show on the master and everyone will get it.  

To make a copy:
Once you have opened the google Form, click on the 3 dots in the right hand corner.  The top option should be "Make a copy".  Click that, name you new doc, and away you go!  (see image below)

Since I have a little bit more space in the blog to share with you I wanted to share some of our thinking about the Google form:

• There is a way to create a "home button" on your ipad so that you can open directly into this form (rather than having to go into your Drive every time).  I think this will be super great to help with time and ease of use.  Perhaps ask your tech dept to help you set that up.  I am sure we could google it to ;)   I haven't done it yet...I just know the possibility exist.  

• There is also the option to voice record your notes rather than type in your notes.  This is also potentially very time saving.   I have not looked into setting that up yet either, but it is on my to-do list for September.

• The idea for the Google form is that you can give access to whomever you would like to collaborate with on collecting documentation.  All you need to do is share the form with them (again, not the master from my blog, rather the copy you make for yourself).  That way they can enter in information as well.  I love this option for itinerant and prep coverage teachers.  As we are still figuring out how they will be reporting on the new Communication Of Learning, I like that we have it all in one place together.  I think this really helps with the notion of "team".  Everyone collaborating together and sharing their documentation.  You can share it with your teaching partner(s) in 2 different ways.  I think how you share it will be depending on your partnership and your needs/situation.  You can simply click the share button in the top right hand corner of the form, and away they go.  Or you can add them as a collaborator, which would allow them to edit the questions on the form.  See the pic above to find the "Add collaborators" options as well.  Only people who are collaborators can see all of the entries.  This also means that they can delete entries.  I know with some of my colleagues who are not as comfy with tech did not want that access - ha!  They just wanted to be able to contribute, and then if they every needed/wanted to look at the overall results, their partner would call it up on their ipad for them.  So, as you can see...totally dependent on the team :)

So that is all I have you on Google Forms lol.  I am not an expert, but I am happy to help in anyway that I can.  Please leave questions or comments below and I will try to get back to you (Faster that I did on Facebook - ha!)

Talk again soon,
Carly

Click here to access the Google Form

Conscious Discipline Part 2

Today's post is a continuation of this post,which introduced Conscious Discipline and explained how I started on this journey.  If you have not read that first post, I encourage you to check it out before you continue with this one.  This is series of post that build on each other :)  As I mentioned before, I am not an official trainer for Conscious Discipline.  I am merely sharing with you my interpretations and understandings as I read, chat and explore.  Let's get started...

We know that we have 3 brain states.  The survival state is our flight or fight function.  SUPER important part of the brain!  If a rock comes flying at your head, and you duck without thinking about it...thank your survival brain :)  The emotional state of our brain is where I tend to operate from in stressful situations, or if I am super tired or frustrated (insert my husband saying "amen" here lol).  This part of our brain is still not where we (or our students need to be for optimal learning).  We may hear students saying "This is stupid",  "I hate you", or name calling when they are in this state.  The 3rd brain state is where we want to be.  The executive state.  This is where we are thinking, communicating and responding at our very best.  You know those moments in class when you look around and all your little kiddos are diligently working, chatting away productively, getting along, and you are flowing freely between students prompting them with questions and challenging their thinking???  That is the sweet spot!  You are all in your executive state.

Conscious Discipline goes into great detail about how each Brain State impacts a child's ability to learn (and how our brain state impacts our ability to teach).  Something that was so eye-opening for me, was learning that the brain is pattern seeking.  It doesn't sound that profound, but for me, it has transformed how I interact with students.  If a child comes from a home where chaos is normal ("chaos" can be caused by a variety of things...lots of fighting, lack of parental involvement, inconsistent presence of parent/guardian, uncertainty where next meal will come from, and so on) that child's normal brain state is set with a level of chaos always being present.

image taken from drinkhelp.ie

In the classroom this may look like the student who "for no reason" goes over at hits a kid, or knocks down their tower and then simply walks away.  Sound familiar?  Are you picturing any of your little friends in your head right now?  These children often appear to have no reaction.  They are not looking to engage in a fight, they are not fired up or melting down.  But now I understand...they are seeking a feeling of "normal" or chaos.  That is their brain's pattern.  That is where it feels "normal".

As educators we work so hard to provide an environment that is calming and supportive of self-regulation (I know I am a HUGE believer in the environment as a third teacher - another post one day perhaps).  But it never occurred to me that in these calming spaces, some students will actually be seeking the feeling of chaos.  WOW!  That has opened my eyes to understanding some student behaviours.

Our job as the adults/educators for these students is to help set a new "normal" for the child's brain.   That is the great news - we can reset our normal (even as adults).  When I was working with a team this year on implementing Conscious Discipline we often came back to this.  We wanted so badly for this little kiddo to be "fixed".  We understood his behaviour (thanks to reading Conscious Discipline), and we were working hard to implement some of the strategies Dr. Bailey provides, but our hearts just wanted to make it better.  I actually found it heartbreaking at times to think about "What is the 'normal' brain state for these students?" - but it is such an important question to ask ourselves.  If we really want to help our students, we need to understanding them on a very intimate level.  We need to understand how their brain is functioning, how that impacts their behaviour, and how we can support them to reach optimal brain functioning.  As a parent, I am charged with the responsibility to help set my children's "normal".  Learning about the brain...amazing stuff!!

Click here to watch a video of Dr. Becky Bailey explaining the 3 brain states.

Talk again soon,
Carly

Our Board's Early Year Key Messages

What are the "must-haves" in Kindergarten?

What does "doing it right" look like?

It was questions like these, and SO MANY MORE, that led me to create the "Early Years Key Messages" (EYKM) poster for our board.  I felt we needed a document to bring us all together.   To give us a common vision that we could all take ownership of.   Not just classroom educators, but school administration as well.  So many of my colleagues would ask me what other schools were doing?  They wondered if their thinking was the same as others.  Did other teams do similar things?

This document was our way of thinking through, and making sense of the messages we are receiving from the Ministry of Education.  It was a way to honour the amazing work of educators in our board, and beyond.  It was a way to bring forward the very best of what we have seen, read about, or heard.

In a presentation I made earlier this year to new Kindergarten educators I shared my thoughts on Kindergarten.  It was just my ramblings that came to mind as I sat down one evening,  yet months later, I still find it rings true for me:

So often I have found myself watching.  I have the opportunity to be in many classrooms with my role, and I often just stand back and watch.  It is such a privilege to be able to do that.  Truly one of my favourite parts of my job.

Before I share the EYKM poster with you, I would like to take a moment to acknowledge the hard work of my colleague, Jackie, who laboured with me through this initial process and was a constant sounding board, co-creator and researcher.  It was important to me that this document reflect not only my thinking, but the thinking of others.  Jackie was invaluable during this process.  We would also like to acknowledge our colleagues in the Ottawa Carleton District School Board who shared with us their resource, allowing us to build upon an excellent resource, and let it evolve into something new.  I would also like to acknowledge our kindergarten steering committee (comprised of teachers, an RECE, guidance counsellor, Principal and Vice-principal, Special Education consultant, technology coaches and curriculum consultants).  Each of them worked so diligently to give us feedback, offer suggestions, edit for clarity and offer different view points.  This document is truly a reflection of many minds.

Here it is!

You can download the PDF here.  My hope is that it is a resource that we can all find ourselves within, and yet be able to see a vision for moving forward.  I hope it sparks conversations, inquiries and professional dialogue.  In our board, we see this document as a "living document".  We are always challenging our thinking, refining our new learning and aiming to hear everyone's voice within it.

You will notice that the EYKM is divided into 6 sections.  No one section is intended to be greater than the other, in fact it is hard to talk about one section without touching upon others.  As you look through this poster I hope you continue to enjoy the "dance" that is Kindergarten :)

Talk again soon,
Carly

Does our digital consent really matter?

        I have recently been challenged by this notion of giving consent for photos/videos of my children to be posted online.  I use to feel like I had power and control over that, but in recent days I have been confronting the fact that perhaps I do not.  Is this just a sign of being in the 21st century  Does it even matter what I say?  

     Every school year the form comes home about granting permission for the school to post or share photos of students.  Every year we sign away permission for printed publications (newspaper, school yearbook, newsletters), but we always indicate "no" for online publications.  5 years ago, this was not such a big deal.  We certainly weren't the only family to decline.  However, this year our family almost stands alone in a school of hundreds.

Why is that?  

      Is it because we are "behind the times"?  Are we unnecessarily protective?  Has society gained a better understanding of the internet, and are now more comfortable with sharing images?  I can hear a voice in my head challenging me with "protect from what?  What is it that you are afraid of?" - actually it is the voice of George Couros.  He actually said that to the audience in a recent session I was at.   He has very strong thoughts on this, and it is an opinion that I respect, but find myself disagreeing with, or at least questioning.

       Why do our children need to have a digital footprint?  Why does my 4 year old need to be online?  I understand that people use Facebook to connect with friends and families far away (and even their neighbours next door).  I too use Facebook and share photos.  I am not anti-Facebook.  I am not anti-Twitter.  I have accounts with both, and use them for a variety of purposes.  I am just feeling the pressure as a parent to let go of my child's rights to decline and remain offline.  I understand the idea of opening up our classrooms to let parents have an inside view the happenings.  It is a way to extend the learning to the home, and spark conversations at the dinner table.  I really do see (and value) that.   HOWEVER, does it have to be on a public site?  Schools have Facebook accounts, Twitter accounts and so on.  Although the privacy setting are "private", do we really understand what that means?  How private is private?  I know that in our children's' school, the Facebook account is monitored by the Principal and he "approves" all the members.  But how well does he actually know them?  When they like or comment on a picture, it becomes public to all their friends.  How can the schools control that?  I ask these questions standing on both sides of this fence.  I am thinking like a parent, but I am also thinking like an educator who uses social media and blogs.

       Today I am asking the question "Does my consent really matter?"  If a complete stranger can take a picture of my family at the local soccer field, post it online to their Facebook account, or the account of the soccer organization without my knowledge (let alone consent)  and someone recognizes me in said photo, then they can tag me.  At that point, I may become aware of the photo, but otherwise it is out there and I am none the wiser.  This very situation happened to me recently.  I was walking into a school and someone commented to me about my photo that was posted on a Facebook page.   It was in a group that I did not even belong to.  So, I tried to look it up...and couldn't get access to it because I was not a member of the group!  On the one hand, I know that someone is "policing" the group's membership, but on the other hand, I am left having no idea what this image of me is that is out there circulating around.  Does that bother anyone else?  If we think about our children, and we embrace the idea that in 10 years when they are applying for jobs, they will be "googled" even before they get an interview.  Their destiny may be impacted by the digital footprint they don't even know exists.  I have recently been reading about ideas that the traditional resume will no longer exist, and rather our digital footprint will be the new resume.  Have you started your digital portfolio?

       My husband and I have been approached several times in the last month about posting pictures of our children online (through the school).  Even though we have already said "no" on the form, we are still being asked the question.  We are hearing things like, "We have this really great photo that we would like to share with parents, but ____ is in it.  Are you okay if we post it?"  or "We just had this really great thing happen in the class, we took a video and _____ is in.  You can hardly see him, but he is there. Can we post it?"  It puts us in a tough position.  We have come to a crossroads of sorts as parents.  We need to sit down and rethink our stance on internet publications for our children.  Do we still believe the correct answer for our family is "no"?  Or are we just holding on to the way we've always done it without allowing ourselves to grow with the times/technology?

       At the end of the day, I am resolving to the fact that this is just a part of education in the 21st century.  We are using technology to break down the walls of our classroom, and part of that may mean putting our children out there.  It has just struck me as odd.  Why ask for consent if our answer is constantly questioned?  Or if we are always being made to feel like we are holding others back from sharing their learning?  or even worse...making our children feel centred out when they are asked to leave a picture "because their parents didn't sign the permission form".   My husband and I are both educators, so we feel like we have a front row view to the amazing things that posting on social media/internet sites can offer a classroom.  But I am wondering, if we are struggling with this a bit, and we are struggling to have open and honest conversations about our concerns for fear of being dismissed or thoughts of as "stick in the muds", how many other families are we putting in the same position?  Are we pushing through our desire to share our learning too fast?  Our classrooms are changing.  They are no longer just within the 4 safe walls of the classrooms, they are around the world.  Our children are meeting and talking in real time with people all over the world.  They are seeing and interacting with the world in a way that we only imagined while reading the textbooks or encyclopedia.  It is amazing...but if I am being honest...a little uncomfortable too.  It is the unknown that makes me question.

     Circling back to my original question of asking for permission...are we just going through the motions of asking parental consent?  And are we unintentionally pressuring them into giving permission?  Is it necessary to do all of this posting of learning?  Are we taking the time to critically ask "why are we sharing this?  What is the learning goal through sharing?"

Just some ramblings inside my head.  If you made it to the end of this post....thanks for sticking in there ;)

Talk again soon,
Carly

     

Conscious Discipline - What is that?

       Earlier this year I was chatting with some colleagues about the overwhelming feelings they had when it came to behavioural management and their students emotional/social needs.  I could feel their frustration, stress and desire to help their students.  Truthfully, my heart went out to them.  I think it is so common when teaching kindergarten (all grades really) to feel overwhelmed and under prepared for the needs that can walk through our doors.  Do you agree?  I know I have felt this way many times over my career.  The children that walk through our doors, walk right into our lives and take hold of a tiny piece of our heart.  There is nothing we wouldn't do to help them grow and become happy, contributing, wonderful members of society.  But the question always remains...what can we do?  Where do we go when we need help?

       Over the course of the last few months I have had the opportunity to work with a team of educators using the Conscious Discipline program.   I remember hearing about this program over the years.  I can't recall anything specific that I knew about it, but for some reason it just popped into my head one day while I was thinking about this team.  So, I googled it.  And thus began this amazing journey that I would like to share with you.

       Before we begin, I am not an expert.  I am not certified to teach or instruct any courses on Conscious Discipline.  I am an educator who has purchased the book, watched the videos, and tried to support some colleagues as they implement this program.  I am a Mom of 3, and I can relate to all of the things Dr. Becky Bailey talks about in the book.  In fact, if you were to look inside my book you would see things highlighted, circled and starred with words like "WOW!", "That's me!" and "OUCH!" written in the margins.  It is an honest and heart felt tool for examining your own behaviour, your parenting, and in my case my teaching practise.  I am so inspired by my learning that I am compelled to share it with you.  If your interest is peaked, perhaps you will begin your own journey.  My plan is to share snippets with you, short posts highlighting my learning and thoughts.  I will do my best to convey my understandings of Conscious Discipline, but will also add in my own reflections and opinions.  Please note that these posts are not going to go into great detail.  You will need to buy the books and watch the videos for that ;)

       Let's start at the very beginning.

If we think of the brain as having 3 parts/states (not based on actual neuroscience - but just to keep it simple).......we have:

The Survival State

The Emotional State

The Executive State

       The Survival State is the one that we will often react out of.  It is the one where a child will hit, kick or bite.  They may even do the opposite and withdraw (run away, hide or shut down).  This is where our brain will go to when we feel threatened.  If a child is hit, they will respond by hitting back, kicking, etc.  The survival state is not always bad.  For example, if someone throws a rock at your head...you duck...that was your survival state kicking in.  Had you paused to think about the pros/cons of ducking, the other options available to you, etc (Executive State), it would have been too late.  You would have gotten a rock in the head.  Thank goodness for the Survival State!

       The Emotional State is one where we operate with verbal aggression.  For me, this is where I see a lot of students (and adults/parents).  It is a step up from the survival state, but still not ideal.  Behaviours we might see if one is operating from here is attention-seeking, name calling, and so on.  As a parent, if I have asked my child to get into the car 5 times and they are still outside doing cartwheels in the grass (can you tell that this has happened to me?), if I respond by saying "Get your behind into this car immediately or I will leave without you", then I am operating from my Emotional State.  If a child is in this sate and they are hit, they may respond with "I hate you.  You're stupid."

       The Executive State is the optimal learning state.  Dr. Bailey refers to it as the CEO of the brain.  This is where we want to be, and where we want our students to be.  The purpose of Conscious Discipline is get our students into this state for as much time as possible.  It is the state where we can make decisions, take in new learning, and gain understanding.  If a child is in this state and someone hits them, they will respond by saying "I don't like it when you hit me, please stop".

       Throughout the book Dr. Bailey gives examples of what each state might present as.  She also outlines what the person in each states needs in order to be able to move up to the next state, eventually finding themselves in the Executive State - ready for optimal learning.  Isn't that the goal of our day as educators?  Don't we want to know ways to move our students into the optimal state for learning?  Do you feel like you spend your day policing and "putting out fires" rather than teaching?  This is what I am hearing from my colleagues.  This is why I am so curious about Conscious Discipline.

Stay tuned for the next post where we will unpack more about how these states impact student learning, and what we can do help students get to (or stay in) that Executive State.

Please check out www.consciousdiscipline.com for more details and to order the book if interested.